Almost… but Not Yet: Enduring your Waiting Season
“The Lord is good to those who wait for him, to the soul who seeks him.” Lamentations 3:25 (ESV)
Most of us have a love-hate relationship with the concept of waiting, and I am certainly no exception. Simple tasks, such as waiting for the traffic light to change when you’re running late or waiting for cookies to finish baking, can seem impossible in the moment, let alone enduring life’s trials that demand a steadfast pursuit of God’s heart. We live in what is often called the “Microwave Culture,” where instant gratification and the highlight reels of social media motivate our behaviors. This contrasts with the character development that God guides and nurtures us through during hardships. Waiting is associated with the season of winter, symbolizing a period of hardship or dormancy. This barrenness is seen as a time where things appear lifeless or inactive.
When I was diagnosed with cancer, it was just one of many burdens I bore during that time. I was also experiencing temporary homelessness, navigating a divorce, job loss and questioning everything I knew about God. I believe the text in Lamentations 3:25 anchored me in my darkest moments. I had unshakable faith that God would heal me, but that wouldn’t exempt me from the impacts of that disease wreaking havoc on my body. Often, what I believed didn’t match what I was proclaiming by faith, and that’s when the attacks would come. Then, I was encouraged to study the book of Job, believed to be one of the first books of the Bible written. Beyond the Passion of Christ, it offers a perspective on the nature of suffering and, more importantly, on God’s desire to restore us to better than before. Job 42:12 states, “The Lord blessed the latter part of Job’s life more than the former part…”
We cannot truly treasure spring (restoration) without enduring winter (suffering). However, I must acknowledge that for some, the restoration they seek may not be found on this side of heaven. I recently had to say goodbye to another friend who lost their fight with cancer. What an honor it was to pray and worship over him as he took his final breaths, but everyone who loved him wanted a different outcome. I often get lost in the loop of asking, “Why them and not me?” In this case, I wondered, “Why did I get to survive cancer and his life was claimed?” But most of the time, it’s, “Why do they get to live out my prayer request, while I continue to suffer in waiting?” Can you relate?
We often think God can only use us once we are on the other side of our circumstances, but as believers, waiting is an action word. In eager expectation, you operate knowing that spring is coming! I don't know your circumstances as you read this text, but if you feel this in the pit of your stomach, I invite you to do three things:
1. Take a moment to just breathe. I hold space with you as you consider the weight and reality of all you’re going through. Cry. Scream. Journal. God can handle your emotions.
2. Consider what God has for you in this season. Look up and around. Who is around you that you wouldn't have seen before if you weren’t in these circumstances? How is God inviting you to minister and pray for them? Or what is He asking you to lay down so that you can rest?
3. Release. Rejoice. Repeat. Release, mourn, and let go of what might or should have been. Rejoice by recalling God's promises from scripture, reminding yourself that what God has in store is far better. Repeat this process as often as necessary. This is where we get to cling to Jesus. Understand that this is not an easy journey and may require support from mentors, spiritual leaders, and mental health professionals.
God can be trusted, friends! Winters benefit us and make us more like Jesus. He is eager to be your strength and guide. Let me pray for you:
Father God, be with Your daughter today as she contemplates the complexities of her circumstances. Thank you that Your yoke is easy and Your burden is light. May she exchange her worry, grief, and heartache for Your peace, hope, and healing. You are near to the brokenhearted, so be with her now. Remind her that you are faithful to redeem and restore all things! Show her Your goodness today. May she feel Your presence and know that even in the waiting, You are working on her behalf. Use it all for Your glory, in Jesus’ name.
Amen!
- Onjalai Brown, The ARISE Team
About Onjalai
Anyone who knows Onjalai Brown probably heard her laugh or saw her smile first. She embodies the joy of the Lord, is a yielded-vessel for God’s glory, an exhorter of anyone she encounters, and a godly unifier – seeking to love and make space for all image bearers of Christ. God has called her to teach, lead, and disciple women back to His heart. She recently launched Awaken Ministries, which exists to encourage women to fulfill their purpose through the power of prayer, insight into scripture, and the transformative influence of the Holy Spirit. She envisions a vast community of AWAKENED women arising and operating in their anointing to boldly proclaim the truth of the Gospel and intentionally seeking ways to radically love those around them.