Close your eyes and imagine, a father gently cradling his daughter. She looks at him with eyes of adoration and awe. He is her protector, her hero, her safe haven. For some of you, this picture is your reality. For others, this type of safety is unimaginable, unattainable. It’s a fantasy. Sister, I see you. I am right there with you. I understand the scars of abuse and neglect all too well. So, when we hear God whisper words like safety, security, and refuge we can’t help but run. It feels a little too good to be true.

Did you know: our childhood experiences mirror our adult relationships? Individuals become securely or insecurely attached based on their relationship with their caregivers. This age-old concept is called attachment theory. Secure attachments form when a child has a consistent and readily available caregiver. On the other hand, insecure attachments form when the caregiver lacks consistency, support, and validation. The child does not have a safe or dependable secure base. As a result, the child can become fussy, needy, or avoidant.

These same relational patterns are repeated in adulthood and evidenced in our closest relationships, including our relationship with God. We project our human experiences onto God and expect Him to follow suit. If we have an absent father or mother, we believe God too, will leave us. If we experienced abuse as a child, then how can we trust God is safe? It can be difficult to view God as our father. Because the reality is, many of us don’t know what it is like to have a protective father.

Consider this: Am I insecurely attached to God?

Do I view God as a safe haven?

Do I expect Him to leave me?

Do I trust God?

Have I been projecting my human experiences onto God?

Is it difficult to view God as my Father?

What is holding me back from trusting He is safe?

Do I want to run towards or away from him?

How do I picture God in my mind?

Our scars are not the end of the story. These attachment woundings may have held our past captive, but sister, it is time to be set free! Are you ready to discover the authentic safety found in God’s embrace?

“Trust in the Lord and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture.”

Psalm 37:3 NIV

Safety is the condition of being protected from harm. In this passage, David illustrates God’s trustworthiness as safe pasture. God is our Good Shepherd, protecting us and shielding us from harm. He carries us in His arms when we struggle to walk or stand upright- when the threat of danger surrounds us.

“He will cover you with His feathers, and under His wings you will find refuge; His faithfulness will be your shield and rampart. You will not fear the terror of the night, nor the arrow that flies by day, nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness, nor the plague that destroys you at midday, A thousand may fall at your side, ten thousand at your right hand, but it will not come near you.”

Psalm 91:3-7 NIV

His faithfulness and consistency act as our shield. Isn’t that beautiful? The very things we lack from humans- safety, security, consistency- God supplies. Danger still looms, but God covers us so we will not be harmed. His love acts as our protection. Have you ever experienced anything this sweet and pure? His protection is overwhelming.

As long as we live on this side of heaven, evil will realm the earth. People will hurt and disappoint us. But God offers us safe pasture, just as David did for his flock. Under his watch, David fought off a lion and a bear. Even though significant dangers threatened the flock, David was on guard. And the sheep were safe in his presence. This is the reality of our Good Shepherd.

When we are carried away from His flock, God rescues us from the jaws we’ve been ensnared, and brings us back to His safe pasture. And when we panic and run in retreat- because we have never known real safety- He comes after us, and hides us under the shadow of His wings.

Take heart, daughter. His safety is real. It isn’t too good to be true.

Don’t fear a thing- because if I invite you in- your arms will protect me. Because you have delight in me as my great lover- I will greatly protect you. I will set you in a high place, safe and secure before my face. I will answer your cry for help every time you pray. And you will find and feel my presence- even in your time of pressure and trouble. I will be your glorious hero and give you a feast. You will be satisfied with a full life and with all I do for you. For you will enjoy the fullness of my salvation. Psalm 91:14-16 TPT

Until we find our safety and security in the Good Shepherd, we will never experience true safety in human relationships. Emotional safety seems like a foreign concept when you are primed for retreat. But God, in His goodness, doesn’t push us. He knows what we need. He gently calls us and pursues us until we are ready to fall into His loving arms. Because I invited Him into the process, God is progressively healing my attachment insecurity.

But friend, it’s your turn. Do you want to be healed?  

“The Lord is my best friend and shepherd. I always have more than enough. He offers me a resting place in His luxurious love.” Psalm 23:1-2a TPT

My dear sister, the time has come to break down your walls and fall into His warm embrace. It won’t be easy, but you will experience a safety unlike anything you have ever known- an all-consuming, unexpected safety. Let’s close our eyes once again. Can you sense The Good Shepherd, holding you, cradling you, rocking you to peaceful sleep- offering you a beautiful resting place in His safe pasture? Soak in this warmth and speak these tender words over yourself: Finally, I am safe.

- Kierstin Almstrum, ARISE Director of Online Operations and Project Management